When They Ask: “What do you bring to the table? “

“What do you bring to the table? “

It is a popular question thrown around a lot in the dating arena. There are so many arguments from people raving about the question in good spirits, to those slightly offended by it. But if you ask me, it’s a weird, toxic question that broke dusties like to ask. Whether Male or female, it’s 9 out of 10 that they’re a dusty if they have to ask that question. Especially to someone you have just met and know nothing about. It’s one of the first questions many knuckleheads tend to ask on the first date and/or conversation, not noticing how foolish they sound to a stranger. 

Let’s have a moment of truth, shall we:

I wish folks would be honest—it’s a stupid question. And if you need to ask Why? It is because Mature, stable, and emotionally intelligent adults aren’t asking that silly question, especially to someone they just met and don’t know the individual from a can of paint. Furthermore, why would you ask that question to a person you call yourself trying to pursue but don’t see value at the surface level from the get-go? Because why would you ask that? 

Don’t get me wrong- In a relationship, both partners have roles that they play, but those roles are based on the dynamic of that specific relationship. When you’re getting to know someone, the first thing out your mouth shouldn’t be “what do you bring to the table”. And to a complete stranger- absolutely Not! 

When it comes to courting, we are all grown! We’re adults, so we should have our own table (foundation), be able to come together, and multiply what we build together. A foundation is the bare minimum you should have as an adult before and when courting. I’m not sure when we lost the plot, but when it comes to the dating arena, if you’re looking for a partner, you should have your own foundation and be standing on your own. Not being a hobosexual or reluctant to be a provider, because if that’s the case, then why are you dating and wasting folks’ time? 

So, What do you bring to the table? 

It’s a question that many immature folks use to size up your value and worthiness, or to put you in a mindset to compete for them. Usually, it’s coming from a person who thinks they are God’s gift to earth. And “you,” the person who just met them 5 minutes ago, should worship the ground they walk on. And yes, I’m gonna take it there because I ain’t lying. There are plenty of podcasts, YouTube/, TikTok/Facebook,/ instagram videos to correlate with the nonsense these immature little grown boys / little grown girls be spewing.

And for the true “Brokies” that don’t have a pot to piss in or a window to throw it out of- they use that question as a means to see what you can do for them or what their conniving tail can get up out of you. So be safe ladies & gents, keep your pocketbook locked and close to you. 

Anyway, people who ask that redundant question are usually people to whom you shouldn’t give the time or day. They don’t have the maturity level of a fully functional, stable & sound-minded adult. When you’re dating someone, it should be getting to know each other authentically. Allow things to grow organically and see if you’re a good fit for one another, and trust me, that doesn’t take 3, 5, 10 years. So, don’t let anyone breadcrumb you. Yes, people can switch up on you at any moment- but you can’t be naive when the red flags pop up within those first few dates and months. Thoroughly vet folks before you let them into your life. Pay attention to the red flags, no matter how many green flags you see.